1. Welcome to Issue #169 (February 2007) of MIND CHATTER, the e-mail newsletter of Centerpointe Research Institute: http://www.centerpointe.com. Mind Chatter is published once a month, on or about the 16th of each month. Please send Mind Chatter to a friend, and please send us your questions, comments, and suggestions. If this issue has been forwarded to you, and you'd like to subscribe to Mind Chatter, visit http://www.centerpointe.com/newsletter. To view Mind Chatter archives, visit http://www.centerpointe.com/newsletter/archives.php ................................................................................ 2. If you would like to unsubscribe, you can manage your account via the link at the end of this newsletter. (But please don't. We like you and we want you to stay.) ................................................................................ 3. In This Issue // MindQuotes (scroll to #5) // A few recommendations that may benefit you (scroll to item #6) // Important Announcements // Feature Article Where is the Love? by Bill Harris, Director (scroll to item #7) // Participant Letters (scroll to #8) // Life Principles In Practice (scroll to #9) // Coach's Corner (scroll to #10) Welcome to our new feature, where each month a Centerpointe Support Coach shares their personal experiences with books that have inspired them, life-changing coaching experiences, and other information we're sure you'll find enlightening and enriching. This month, we hope you'll enjoy: Are You Asking the Questions? by Keith Prior ................................................................................ 4. MIND CHATTER contains articles about: // How you create your life--and how you can stop unconsciously creating experiences and outcomes you do not want, and instead begin to create exactly what you do want // Personal and spiritual growth in general // Meditation (high--and low-tech) // Recovery from emotional trauma // Pretty much any other subject I get excited about and want to write about. After all, it's my company and my newsletter, and I can do whatever I want with it. So there. ................................................................................ 5. Mind Quotes Love is the greatest refreshment in life. --Pablo Picasso You have not lived a perfect day, unless you've done something for someone who will never be able to repay you. --Ruth Smeltzer I realize that if I wait until I am no longer afraid to act, write, speak, be, I'll be sending messages on a Ouija board, cryptic complaints from the other side. --Audre Lorde Think of all the beauty still left around you and be happy. --Anne Frank ................................................................................ 6. The lazy man's way to meditate Amazing, scientifically proven brain technology gives you all the benefits of meditation, in a fraction of the time, easily and effortlessly. Try it yourself, FREE! "You told me I'd meditate like a Zen monk, literally at the touch of a button, and it's true! This is like meditation on steroids!" --Michelle S., Baltimore, MD Did you know that people who meditate everyday are many times happier than those don't? They're also healthier, and live longer. And, their sense of well-being is much greater than that of non-meditators. In fact, meditators are so much healthier that some insurance companies charge lower premiums for meditators than for the rest of the general population. Meditators' minds are also sharper, and their problem-solving abilities are better. That's one reason why many high-powered executives, and even CEOs of Fortune 500 companies, meditate. Did you also know that meditators make a LOT more pleasurable brain chemicals--the ones you feel on those days when you feel REALLY good--and, they make these feel-good brain chemicals pretty much ALL THE TIME? Did you know that meditators have dramatically better mental health? They have less anxiety, anger, depression, and fear, and they have better human relationships, more friends, and feel... ...much more fulfilled in their lives? So with all these benefits, why isn't everyone meditating? You know why. To get these results, you have to meditate four or five hours a day, often for decades, and few people are willing to do this. And, meditation, especially at first, isn't much fun. The initial experience is somewhere between boring and frustrating. Finally, it takes quite a long time to notice any significant results, much less to experience the benefits I just mentioned. But what if I told you that you could meditate as deeply as a Zen monk, literally at the touch of a button, and do it the very first time, and every time... ...and also make all those happy brain chemicals the first time and every time? Not only that, within a very short period of time--days or weeks instead of years or decades--you could begin receiving all the benefits I just mentioned--the physical health benefits, the mental health benefits, the clarity-of-mind benefits, the relationship benefits, and... ...the overall sense of well-being. And, you don't have to learn any complex mental gymnastics, or spend hours a day to get all of this. Instead, you'll be using a scientifically-proven audio technology called Holosync, that will easily and effortlessly place you in the electrical brain wave patterns of deep meditation, every time. Over the last 20 years, nearly 300,000 people in 173 countries have used Holosync audio technology to dramatically improve their lives. You can, too. It's easy, it's inexpensive, it feels VERY good... ...and it's 100% guaranteed. Skeptical? I don't blame you. I was too, until I tried it for myself. And, that's what I suggest you do--try it. In fact, I'd be happy to send you a FREE demo CD and a free Special Report right now, so you can see what I'm talking about. Just click here, and I'll send it right out to you. +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ http://www.centerpointe.com/demo/ +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ** // ** Announcements You can resolve that big issue you've been struggling with... The amazing 5-Day Transformation for those who don't have time to wait for tremendous change! Participants at our last retreat were blown away by the new material I presented--and you will be, too! Though I knew it was going to happen, it still was quite shocking. I'm used to seeing people leave Centerpointe retreats experiencing a huge transformation, but as people left our latest retreat, something was different--very different. Though a part of me expected it, I was still awed by what happened. Person after person approached me as the retreat ended and said, "You changed my life"..."I don't know how to thank you"... "This was the missing piece for me"..."I can't thank you enough." Why in the world did this happen? I've been getting tremendous positive feedback about these retreats for many years, but never anything like this. Why was the feedback even more positive? Here's what I think: in addition to all the other powerful things we do at the retreats, I completely changed the material I present to reflect the Nine Principles for Conscious Living I teach in my Life Principles Integration Process online courses.* This material describes how we create unhappiness and suffering and how we can create happiness and inner peace instead. Because this description is so clear, everyone who heard it (and practiced it during the retreat) had a huge shift. I promise that the same thing can happen for you... If you've ever thought of attending a retreat...or coming to your 2nd or 3rd retreat...NOW would be the time to come. Here is one person's description of what happens at these retreats: "There's no way to really describe it. It was intense, emotional, hilarious, intimate, fun, exciting and overwhelming all at the same time. Most wonderful was being part of a group that accepted, supported, listened, laughed and cried with me. We arrived carrying different bags but left singing the same tune, and manifested such respect and love for one and all. "It was like falling in love with 50 people at the same time. Each so different and yet the same. It sounds impossible and perhaps that's why it was so special--being with a group of human beings that most people only read about but never get to truly immerse themselves in. "I learned a lot about myself and how I interact with others. I learned that being vulnerable, being open and sharing with others takes tremendous courage. So I want to thank each and every one of the participants and the staff because each one took the necessary risks to create that tremendous group dynamic at the retreat. "If anyone out there is wondering about going on the next retreat, stop wondering and just do it. It just might change your life." --Mickey R. At a Centerpointe retreat... // You'll experience a true quantum leap--taking everything to a higher level... // With some of the most experienced "personal change coaches" in the world, you'll experience a profound shift in that life issue you so much want (and need) to change... // You'll meet other Centerpointe participants who become lifelong friends... // You'll "get" what "it" (and your life) is all about, and... // You'll experience some "industrial strength" Holosync, pushing you to new levels of personal growth, positive change, and deeper self-awareness. I'm at a loss to precisely describe what happens and what it feels like, but I'll tell you this... ...it feeds a deep part of every person who attends. This experience of unconditional positive regard, just by itself, creates tremendous change--not to mention everything else that happens at a retreat. (No one, I hasten to add, is forced to open up or be close to others, but you will feel safe doing so, and you'll find yourself feeling good doing so.) Here's another big reason for coming... As he has at retreats since 1992, performer/song-writer/old soul/recording artist/genius/amazing human being Michael Stillwater--who participants describe as spellbinding, entrancing, heart-opening, and awe-inspiring--will be there. I couldn't imagine a retreat without Michael's love and talent. Michael is one of the funniest human beings I know (every year he composes several absolutely hilarious songs spoofing me and Centerpointe that have everyone rolling in the aisles), and he's one of the most talented song writers and performers on the planet (really). He was asked to perform at the 9/11 Memorial Service in Washington, D.C., and has the ability to help people touch the deepest parts of themselves. I know you'll find him to be... ...one of the most amazing experiences of your entire life (really)! On the last evening we'll have a big celebration to bring everything to a climax. These end-of-retreat celebrations are always awesome, and I'm sure this one will be, too! In fact, my commitment is to make each retreat even better than the last one--which means you're sure to have an incredible experience! This retreat could be a real turning point in your life... You'll leave the retreat renewed and changed. If there's something that's been difficult for you to resolve in your life, or if you just want to move to a new level in your growth, this retreat could be the turning point--as it has been for nearly everyone who has attended. You don't have to drive, work, cook, problem solve, take care of others, or do anything except meditate, open your heart, heal your past, take charge of your life, let go of what's been holding you back, make new friends--and, move your life to a whole new level. You really can experience 6 months (or more) of growth...in just 5 days! I know this sounds like an outlandish promise, but it's absolutely true. People rave about our retreat staff... Even if this were all, this next retreat would be incredible. But, in addition, I'm absolutely thrilled to again have Dr. Beverlee Marks Taub, Ph.D. ("Dr. Bev"), as part of the retreat staff. I've known and worked with Dr. Bev since 1985. She helped me create the original Centerpointe support materials, and is one of the country's most top transformational therapists. I've seen Dr. Bev help resolve difficult and long-standing issues in a single therapeutic session. If you need a breakthrough, she will be available to help you achieve it. Here's what Dr. Bev said after a previous retreat: "Bill Harris has swirled together a magical mix of technology, supportive staff and evocative processes, which provide a safe crucible for the changes waiting to happen. "Participants know at a deep level they are safe. The grosser elements of psychic and emotional debris are thrown off, revealing the pure gold of the true authentic self, waiting to be reclaimed. "Bill is the Grand Master of this whole show. Part scientist and part irreverent talk show host, he penetrates the collective social facade, and gets everybody laughing about the riotous 'stuff' we all have and take so seriously. He wields his precision technology like a laser and knows just how and when to go deeper or to lighten up. "Bill says in his commentary on the process that five days on retreat provides six months of transformational growth. Because I saw physical, emotional and spiritual evidence to support this claim, I now believe this is true." Internationally known therapist and workshop leader Doris Laesser will also be there. Doris has been in private practice for two decades, working at University Children's Hospital in Zurich, as a lecturer at the Institute for Psychology and the Fritz Perls Institute, and has been a workshop leader at the Cortona Conference in Italy for the University of Zurich. And, Mariah Wentworth and Jean Greene, our two "body specialists," will be there, leading us each day in movement and stretching and giving... ...incredible massages. So please, come to the retreat. You'll have a tremendous experience, you'll learn a lot, you'll dramatically accelerate your growth, you'll listen to some very powerful Holosync soundtracks, you'll meet a lot of great people, and you'll... ...learn some exciting new things about...you! The cost for all this is only $2877 (tuition and lodging combined). This includes accomodations for six nights, three delicious meals a day, all presentations, and lots of attention from me and from the incredible growth coaches we've invited. Here's my personal guarantee: If, at the end of the retreat, you don't think it was the most transformative experience you've ever had, just come see me before you leave and I'll refund your tuition. I make this guarantee because I know if I can just get you there... ...something will happen that will change your life forever! Please act quickly, though. This upcoming retreat is already over half full, even before I send this issue of Mind Chatter! For the last several retreats, it's become common for us to turn people away. So if you want to be at this next one... ...please let us know right away. To reserve your spot, we need a $495 deposit, payable with Visa, Mastercard, check or money order. Please note that this deposit is not refundable, unless we cancel the retreat. The balance of your payment will be due 45 days before the retreat begins. For more infomation, including the specifics of each retreat, go to www.centerpointe..com and click on retreats, or call us at 1-800-945-2741 or 503-672-7117. So that's it. Please come. You'll be shaking your head in wonder when it's all over, just as I was after the last retreat. You really can make tremendous progress with--even totally resolve--that big issue you've been struggling with. I'm really excited to finally meet you in person, and I know you'll enjoy meeting the other participants. To avoid the possibility of missing out, please call or write now to reserve your spot. See you there! Regards, William Harris, Director P.S.: Don't forget: there is a 100% money back guarantee on this retreat. I expect it to fill up fast, so reserve your spot right away. Spending five days with Michael Stillwater and Dr. Beverlee Marks Taub and Doris Laesser (and me!) is worth the price of the retreat all by itself, so don't delay! Reserve your spot now by calling 1-800-945-2741 or 503-672-7117. Or send your deposit to: Centerpointe Research Institute, 1700 NW 167th Place, Suite 220, Beaverton OR 97006. You can also reserve your spot by faxing your name, address, and credit card number with expiration date to 503-643-3114. (For more info, and to see pictures of past retreats, go to www.centerpointe.com and click on "Retreats.") ................................................................................ 7. Feature Article Where is the Love? By Bill Harris The question has come up lately of why (and how) meditating with the Holosync(R) audio technology we use in the Centerpointe program causes such an opening of the heart, and such an increase in the ability to love and to attract love into one's life. Why do people in the program become so much more open, more loving, and more compassionate? Sometimes people at first miss this aspect of the program because we don't spend much time speaking about "love," or teach people a philosophy that tells them how to behave, or tell them "how" to become more loving. Here's why: There is no instruction booklet for loving. Love is not something you "learn" how to do, nor is it a habit you can develop if you try hard enough. It is not intellectual information to be packed into the brain prior to it becoming part of a repertoire of behavior "skills." You can't decide to be more loving or become more loving as a result of some sort of conceptual change in what you think or believe. Love is much more fundamental than any kind of thinking or believing. Love, rather, is the root and basis of who you are, at the most fundamental level. This means that anything other than love as an expression of your being is artificial and unnatural and is a result of not knowing who you are. Which doesn't mean it doesn't happen! So why is the world filled with so much that is not loving? Very simply, it is because many (most?) people's experience of life and the world around them is an experience of separation, of being in opposition to outside forces that seem hostile in some way, and from which one must protect oneself (or so it seems). Stress (and all the behaviors that go with stress) is one way these feelings of separation manifest. Stress is only possible when the world is viewed as hostile, when we want "what is" to be different than it is. As long as we are letting "what is" be whatever it is, and are not attached to it being something different, we cannot be stressed. For most people, easier said than done. As I have said so many times, anger, depression, anxiety, fear, and many other so-called "dysfunctional" and unloving/unloved feelings and behaviors are really attempts to cope with being pushed past your personal threshold for what you can handle coming at you from your world (inner and outer). The more feelings of separation, the lower this threshold. The lower the threshold, the more feelings of separation--and the more stress and suffering. Simply put, meditating with Holosync causes the reorganization of the brain/mind at higher levels of functioning, which causes this threshold to go higher and higher. As it goes up, fewer parts of the world seem threatening and it becomes easier to see the world as okay and to let "what is" be whatever it is. It is very typical for people in the deeper levels of the program to tell us they rarely experience anything that is too much for them and can push them out of their naturally loving and peaceful state. In fact, one of the first things people notice during the first few months of the program is that things that bothered them and triggered anger, fear, depression, or some other suffering state, don't seem to bother them as much or even at all. They seem to be able to let these things be okay and not suffer over them, even of they would prefer they were different. This doesn't mean we can't act to change things or to relieve suffering we see, but it does mean we become less and less attached to the outcome, in the sense that we don't have to suffer if the outcome is different than what we want it to be. Outcomes we were addicted to become preferences. This not only saves us a lot of pain, but because we are acting to create change from a centered and calm place, we become much more effective in actually making something happen instead of just venting and spinning our wheels. The other thing that happens when you meditate with Holosync(R) is that the brain becomes more balanced and the two sides of the brain begin to work together to a greater and greater degree. Instead of a lateralized brain, we begin to exhibit a synchronized, balanced, brain. Instead of viewing the world from either the left brain or the right brain, we view it with a whole-brain. Remarkably, the more this happens, the more we see the world in terms of the oneness and connectedness of all things, and the less we see it as a place of tension and opposition and danger. When this happens, our true nature as loving and compassionate beings naturally shines forth, without any change in beliefs or any kind of intellectual changes. Intellectual changes may happen, but they are the result, not the cause, and they come after the loving nature manifests, not before. As I was writing this, Marc Gilson, our Director of Customer Services, told me a story. A participant called our Support Hotline the other day and described a series of very stressful and contentious events at her work. Throughout a very highly charged struggle with a co-worker, she was mystified to find she continued to have very loving feelings toward her "opponent" in this struggle, and that the situation eventually resolved itself in great part because of this underlying attitude. "Could this have been the Holosync?" she asked us. Marc told her, "No, it was you, but certainly this part of you was stimulated to come out by your use of Holosync." In actual fact, we hear reports like this nearly every day. As people become more balanced, and as their threshold for stress goes higher and higher, the natural perfection in everything, and that we are all directly connected to one another in the most intimate way, seems more and more obvious. Just as you love your hand, for instance, and wouldn't purposely do anything to harm it, once you experientially realize we're all connected to one another, it becomes pretty hard to not care for others as you would for yourself--in other words, the Golden Rule becomes natural behavior, not just something you learned and might try to follow now and then. So don't be surprised as you become less reactive, less stressed, and more loving, to yourself and to others, as you use the Centerpointe program. The program really does no more than uncover who you really are from under the various layers of the illusions of separation you may have learned. Holosync(R) takes the dust off the mirror of your soul, one day at a time, so it can more readily reflect the light of the love that makes up everything that exists. And if you have that, what more could you possibly need? ................................................................................ 8. Participant Letters Dear Bill, Where to start. I finished the last of the three courses last May. I have since retired from my military career, worked for a defense contractor for 2 months, and decided to start my own consulting business. I never would have had the courage and the method to do this without taking this course and following your advice. I was able to find the discipline and the faith to follow your advice and to develop a definite major purpose. I started reading (and eventually reciting from memory) my definite major purpose statement around one year ago, before going to bed and upon arising. After about 2 months, my point of view on things started to change. I started to see more opportunities and was looking for ways to implement my business ideas (i.e. start a consulting practice). This is what lead me to take a civilian job last April. It just felt right and the hesitation was completely gone. Once I was a civilian though, I couldn't stop thinking about starting my business. I had wanted to wait a year and a half after relocating to Montreal, but in June I registered the business, got my GST number, registered a domain name and found a company to do my logo, website and stationery. I had no clients and no clear idea of what I would do. ....In July I told my employer that I was "retiring" from his firm. The defense client we were serving wanted me to work for him, so I got my first consulting gig that way. Had I not quit the day job and tried to go part-time, I never would have got that one. Since then, I have also done one pro bono project for a local non-profit entity in order to get experience, referrals, and testimonials. I have also been meeting prospects and following up on leads. The defense client has been so impressed with my work that he wants to renew our contract in April. I have already told him my fee is going up, but he's willing to meet it because he wants me to do work for him. ....I wish I could tell you more, but I don't want to go overboard. However, let me say that your courses, and the Holosync solution, are the best things that ever happened to me. I believe there is a Zen saying that goes something like this: When the student is ready, the teacher will appear. Bill, you have been a spiritual teacher of great depth and wisdom for me, as well as a caring life coach. I often listen to these lessons in my car, especially those in the third course. Sometimes I can have down days and get discouraged, but between your materials, my mentor, my wife, and good old Napoleon Hill (as well as Holosync), I quickly get back into my stride. It's been an honour to be part of your program, and I hope to continue for many years to come. Sincerely, Richard Bill, Just want to say a special thank you. Holosync has given me my life back. I was very sceptical of everything I read and listened to when I was considering trying out Holosync in January 2006. But, I was so far down a SAD black hole that I was pretty desperate to try anything. Well, here I am after 10 months on the programme, just received level 2 and I appear to have achieved the peace of mind I had as a teenager. Stress level protection seems to have increased dramatically, so also has all my interpersonal relationships. My main objective was to achieve peace of mind--if i havent got there, then, I'm very close to it. I also took up Yoga and Qi Gong and listen to Paul Sheele's "relaxation CD. This is a powerful medium. My genuine state of wellbeing has enabled me to open up to others like me, and, I'm glad to say one of my colleagues from work who lives in Co Mayo has just purchased her first holosync programme. I know from speaking from her that she has benefitted no end. ...Regards and thank you very much. Declan Dear Bill, Thank you so much for your support and encouragement with the Holosync Solution Program. They say "when the student is ready the teacher will appear"!! This was true in my case. I came across your program at a time when my life was turned upside down--absolute chaos! I have been with the program for a month now and the anxiety, anger and fear of not knowing how I was going to cope has changed. I have found a meaning to what is happening and more accepting of it. I am calmer and clear thinking. I have meditated for years but have never felt so peaceful after using your program. It is fantastic! I look forward to your Support Follow-up Letters. I find them very enlightening. I enjoyed reading your book "Threshold of the Mind" and listening to the 6-CD set recording of the 2003 Spring Retreat--together they helped me understand the program a lot better. I look forward to the next levels with enthusiasm--your continued support makes me feel you really care that we succeed. I cannot thank you enough for your help and encouragement. Thank you Bill. Sincerely, Dagma ................................................................................ 9. Life Principles In Practice Chaos is a Good Sign Chaos is part of the process of positive change, and the only way you can suffer during this process is to resist it. Resistance is nothing more than making internal representations of what you don't want, and you can choose what internal representations to make. The Power is Yours There is one thing in this world that you have total and complete control over, if you will exercise it, and that is how you focus your mind. No matter who you are, where you are, what your situation, or what has happened in the past, you can choose what to focus on. Luckily, this is what determines everything else. The Price You'll Pay If you focus on what you want to avoid, the price you have to pay, and what you have to give up, here's what happens: first, you'll feel bad. Any time you focus on what you don't want, you feel bad. In fact, ALL bad feelings are the result of focusing on what you don't want, what you want to avoid, what you're worried about, or what you're afraid ofall of which are really the same thing. Second, when you focus on what you don't want you have to make some sort of internal representation of it. When you do that you give your mind an instruction to create or attract more of itwhich is the last thing you want. Intention is Key Focusing on what you don't want is THE cause of self-sabotage. Your brain takes what you focus on and makes it come true for you, and it doesn't care whether you're focusing on it because you want it or because you don't want it. Your conscious mind knows you don't want it, but the part of you that actually creates the result doesn't. That's just the way your mind works. It would be nice if your mind could tell the difference between a picture of what you want and one of what you don't want, but the truth is, it can't. How Do You Respond? Everyday, all day long, things happen for you. One of the key characteristics of people who are happy and who are in charge of creating what they want is how they respond to these moment-by-moment experiences. Surrender Safety Some people feel that it's just not safe to change, and they let that feeling block them. Actually, if you don't feel safe in the world, it's a result of your current method of processing what happens. If you don't feel safe right now, instead of blocking change, you must change. As long as you keep doing things the same way, you'll keep getting the same resultsand, you'll continue to feel unsafe. ................................................................................ 10. Coach's Corner Are You Asking the Questions? by Keith Prior // Keith Prior has worked as a Centerpointe Support Team Member for four years. He is an avid cyclist and accomplished musician. He's been influenced by the work of Robert Anton Wilson, Alan Watts, and The Masters of The Secret, and is well-versed in a wide range of personal development teachings. He lives in Beaverton, Oregon with his wife and children. It is said that power without control is nothing. In order for power to be used effectively it must be focused and controlled. Walter Lippmann, a journalist and philosopher once said, "It is easier to develop great power than to know how to use it well." When I think about power and control I think of a rocket ship and the hundreds of thousands of pounds of thrust that is needed to lift it into space. But without a guidance system that power will cause the rocket to go off course and to be destroyed along with everything in it. So in this case, power without control can lead to destruction. However, as individuals, there are times when this need for control can be the very cause of our suffering. On the surface, it makes sense that in order for us to live our lives successfully we must have control over our thoughts, our power, and our feelings, and then to come to some kind of understanding of it all. This is the way the human mind seems to work. But is seeking control the best approach? In almost four years as a Centerpointe coach I have spoken to thousands of participants who are going through a process of change. These people regularly experience discomfort and suffering as they become aware of aspects of themselves they don't like. After a few years, I started noticing a common thread. These people all ask themselves questions like these: "What is it?" "What is causing it?" "Is it normal?" "What is it that's wrong with me?" "How long will it last?" "How do I fix and or stop it?" The 'it' in all these questions represents what we don't want, what we are scared of, or what feels bad. We start to seek control over 'it'. However, in order for us to know what 'it' is, or what is causing 'it,' or how to rid ourselves of 'it,' we have to bring our attention to 'it.' In his lectures and articles, Bill frequently talks about the idea that what you bring attention to, you attract. If you bring attention to things you don't want, you attract more of 'it' into your life. As a result, you suffer. Our desire to understand and to control causes us to suffer. This is our natural tendency, so when you realize you're doing it again (and we all do) don't be hard on yourself. In last month's Coaches Corner, my colleague Nancy Carlton wrote a wonderful piece about what happens when we beat ourselves up for falling back on our old programming. When we return to our old ways where we try to control ourselves or try to control the problem (the 'it') we only attract more of it. Witnessing yourself with conscious awareness during these times is the way out. The great philosopher Ken Wilber said it best when he said, "awareness in and of itself is transformative." So when you find yourself suffering, see if you are asking yourself one of these questions. You may notice that most of the times you feel bad you are trying to make sense of the bad feelings. On some level you might be asking one or two or maybe even all of these questions. When you realize this is happening, remember to smile and laugh and, most importantly, to be curious. =//=