|
1. Welcome to Issue #126 (November 16, 2003) of MIND CHATTER
2. Do you want to Unsubscribe?? Gasp!! Please don't! You can manage your account via the links at the beginning and end of the newsletter.
3. How to create exactly what you want, both inside and out...
As many of you know, about sixteen weeks ago I started a series of teleconference calls, in which I'm teaching three courses, of 12 calls each, collectively called The Life Principles Integration Process. Over 900 people signed up for
these calls, and the feedback I'm getting has been incredible--beyond my wildest dreams. People are experiencing huge positive changes, and the calls have been a ton of fun.
As a result, we've decided to make these calls, plus written notes of them, several very revealing self tests, the homework, plus direct personal access to me, via email, for any questions--and several other things I don't have room to
describe here--available to everyone who didn't sign up for the live calls...
....in an on-line form.
In this on-line version, you can take the courses on your computer, either by listening via audio-streaming, or by downloading the calls to listen to later or to burn them onto a CD. As in the live calls, I am making myself personally
available, by email, to answer any questions you have about anything during the course.
In these calls, we're digging very deeply into the exact, specific reasons why and how you may be unconsciously creating results in your life, both internally and externally, that you don't want--and how
you can create EXACTLY what you do want. (Yes, Virginia, it is possible.)
This on-line version is now ready for you. I hope you'll participate, since this is the most powerful and effective material I've ever offered in the entire fourteen-year history of Centerpointe.
And, you do not need to already be a participant in The Holosync Solution to take these courses, by the way.
Here are a few emails I've received from people in the course:
Dear Bill,
I want to express my excitement--and thanks to you and your telecourse for some real progress.
I had a very poor relationship with my mother & sisters that caused me pain.I was very afraid of having a health crisis relapse, and at mid-life I was struggling with my weight. I thought everyone was out to get me, so I'd beat them
to the punch. Not big issues, but underlying bombs waiting to go off.
Then, I learned why (my beliefs, values system, strategies) was contributing to why I wasn't happy with in my life.
I learned to accept "what is" and quit fighting that. I learned to heal past pains of not being loved, accepting the lessons from my struggles and not being afraid of my health issues--moving toward instead of away from my goals. I learned
to follow successful models in my eating plan and listened to my intuition.
I can't believe the changes in me. This is from someone who thought she had it mostly all together. Wow--the layers! I have learned to have compassion for my mothers & sisters, and have let go of the sadness for not being able to
change "what is." My health worries are no longer my #1 goal. My clothes fit well, and I have plenty of energy because I'm eating right for life--not just a diet.
I am happy.
Thank you so much. I didn't realize how the brain works in us, but thank you for enlightening me. I can understand, it makes sense to me, and I can change the things that haven't been working for me. Life is so much easier when you lighten
the pain that doesn't need to be there any longer.
I can't wait for the second telecourse. I can't imagine what lessons that will teach me. I am so glad that you are in my life.
--Marilyn
Just wanted to let you know that I really like the way that this course is set up, i.e. downloadable call and notes. I've listened to the call twice already after I've downloaded it on to my hard drive and having the notes to follow along
with has been very helpful as well. Your notes/outline is very good and allows me to listen along quite effectively. Looking forward to the next call. Thanks.
--Terry I.
Hi, I really liked the Telecourse # One. I think it will be very helpful.
--R. B.
It is as I hoped it would be worth the effort. Keep it coming!
God Bless.
--Patrick B.
So you can get a better idea what the course is like, I'm offering a FREE preview lesson, which is available now for you to listen to online. This free lesson contains some great stuff, so please go listen to it.
For more information about the course and the preview lesson, and to actually listen to the FREE preview lesson,
click here
I'd love to get an email from you in a few weeks telling me how much YOU have benefited!
Be well.
Bill
4. In This Issue:
**Mind Quotes (scroll to item #8)
**Improve Your Relationship by Kathlyn and Gay Hendricks,
creators of ATTRACTING GENUINE LOVE
and other cyber-courses on transformation (scroll to item #9)
**FEATURE ARTICLE:
by Bill Harris, Director (scroll to item #10)
**Glowing Testimonial of the Month (scroll to item #11)
**BOOK REVIEW by Heather Self
How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
By, David Richo (scroll to item #12)
Foreword By, Kathlyn Hendricks
Published by Shambhala, 2002
**Important Announcements (scroll to item #13)
5. MIND CHATTER contains articles about:
** How you create your life -- and how you can stop unconsciously creating experiences and outcomes you do not want, and instead begin to create exactly what you do want.
**Personal and spiritual growth in general.
**Meditation (high and low-tech)
**Recovery from emotional trauma.
**Pretty much any other subject I get excited about and want to write about.
6. Free on-line Holosync demo, or free Holosync demo CD or cassette--for yourself or for a friend:
If you aren't in the program now and would like to hear and experience a sample of what Holosync can do for you, please listen to our on-line Holosync demo:
click here to listen to on-line Holosync demo.
If you prefer, we can mail you a FREE CD or cassette version of this demo, along with a free Special Report on how Holosync can change your life. Visit our web site or call 800-945-2741 for details.
7. Finally, if you aren't already benefiting from the Centerpointe program--PLEASE JOIN! (What are you waiting for??) There's a RISK FREE one-year money-back guarantee and you can even pay in convenient payments on your credit card.
I will also include a free copy of my new book, Thresholds of the Mind, for any Mind Chatter subscribers who join the program.
You can join by calling 1-800-945-2741 or 503-672-7117 - 24 hours a day.
Or, just
click here.
We look forward to having you in the program and helping you dramatically accelerate your mental, emotional, and spiritual growth, as over 110,000 people in 172 countries have already done!
8. Mind Quotes
"Placing the blame or judgment on someone else leaves you powerless to change your experience; taking responsibility for your beliefs and judgments gives you the power to change them."
- Byron Katie
"Life in itself is an empty canvas,
it becomes whatsoever you paint on it.
You can paint misery, you can paint bliss.
This freedom is your glory."
- Osho
"Nothing is so simple that it cannot be misunderstood."
- Freeman Teague
"To let go in the deepest recesses of the heart, to release all struggle and wanting, leads us to that
knowing which is timeless."
- Jack Kornfeld
9. Improve Your Relationship
by Kathlyn and Gay Hendricks, creators of ATTRACTING GENUINE LOVE
RELATIONSHIP QUESTION OF THE MONTH:
QUESTION:
In a healthy relationship, is the element of need/needing each other a vital component? I associate the word need with clingy, co-dependent and see that as negative. I am a very independent woman, and I do not feel the need for someone to
complete me, being the missing piece of the puzzle etc. Instead I want my partner to be just that - a partner . My ideal relationship is two independent individuals who come together and share their worlds, and merge into their own world a
deux. One draws strength from the other and vice versa - but to need someone or they will die/go crazy without him/her...I do not understand that concept. Maybe you can shed some light into this matter.
Thanks.
Hi Tiana,
Thanks for this intriguing question. We have found in our work with thousands of couples that need generally points to an unresolved issue from the past. For example, if one partner says, I need you to listen to me more, we would encourage
that person to look at the source of needing and not getting listening. These issues are almost never current, but rooted in parental or sibling interactions that replay in close adult relationships. It has been our experience that in
healthy relationships people come together as equal creators of the relationship they WANT, and handle the resolved issues from the past as they emerge from the enhanced energy of close relationship. --Kathlyn Hendricks
RELATIONSHIP TIPS:
WITHHOLDING A MAJOR DISCONNECT IN RELATIONSHIPS
Withholding is a major, core problem in relationships. The dictionary says that to withhold is to restrain, to hold back, to conceal. It is a habit learned early, and it fades slowly if at all. Withholding is the act of holding back
something that needs to be said.
Withdrawal and projection are the natural outcomes of withholding. When you withhold, you keep inside yourself things that should be expressed. The very act of hiding these things takes you one step back from the relationship.
A result of this withdrawal is that you will begin to project. In other words, you will begin to attribute to other people things that are actually issues of your own. Withdrawal follows withholding so swiftly that often we do not notice
the sense of distance at first.
The tendency to hide how we feel is so ingrained that it often lasts long into even the healthiest relationship. In our own relationship, where we have been practicing these principles for well over a decade, we still have to maintain
constant vigilance to make sure we do not slip back into hiding our feelings and desires from each other.
TO BEGIN THE JOURNEY TO THE RELATIONSHIP OF YOUR DREAMS,
click here
10. This Issue's Feature Article:
by Bill Harris, Director
"Nothing Has Ever Worked for Me"
by Bill Harris, Director
From time to time, I receive letters from people who say Holosync isn't working for them. In fact, those who say Holosync isn't working invariably tell me that NOTHING they've ever done has worked for them.
As a past member of that club, I feel a special compassion for these people, and a particular satisfaction in helping them.
Luckily, the "nothing works for me" problem has an easily identifiable root cause--though the solution takes some hard work.
Below is a letter from such a person, and my answer. I hope you find it helpful.
**
Hi Bill,
My name is Elliot.
I know you're busy and probably get a lot of these, so I'll get right to the
point. November will be one year since I purchased the Prologue, however I did not start using it on a consistent basis till around this past May--so it has,
therefore, been only about 5 months that I have been using it.
I know everyone is different--and by no means am I viewing this a "quick
fix"--but I, unfortunately, have seen no effect from using it to date. As
well, I have had no--what you refer to as--upheaval. I also find that,
during my sessions, my mind pretty much stays on "noise overload." I thought
that at least these two things would have changed in 5 months, but no such
luck.
Bill, I am one of those people who have literally tried everything under the
sun--particularly within the past 10 years or so--all leaving me with
nothing but an empty wallet. In fact, my will to change is so strong, that I
have become somewhat of a "therapy junkie."
Sadly--VERY sadly--things only continue to get worse for me. And with each
new thing I try that doesn't work, I lose that much more hope. Although I am
now broke and over $30,000 in debt, it is not so much the money as much as
it is the disappointment of yet something else not working.
What attracted me to Holosync was the fact that someone like me basically
had no choice in it being effective. It was "physical." And believe me, it
is with that in mind that I very badly want it to work (that and the fact
that I have pretty much run out of options at this point). You see, my
subconscious has become expert in keeping anything from penetrating it--and
I do mean "expert"!
Holosync's praises were even--coincidentally-- sung by an MD, who's with an HMO no less!!(he's on level 2 or 3).
So, here I am at this crossroads: Do I continue or send it back? (That is,
of course, rhetorical.)
It is my hope, Bill, that I could perhaps speak a bit more at length with
you about this--musician to musician. Thank you for your time and I hope to hear from you soon.
Elliot
Elliot,
Thanks for writing.
It actually does not matter AT ALL what happens while you are listening. It also doesn't matter if you have "upheaval," though you may be having some and don't realize it. And having a lot of mental activity while meditating is very
common, and is not a sign that Holosync isn't working.
When you meditate, you drop down into parts of the unconscious where there are a lot of stresses, especially if you have been traumatized, as I expect you have been. As these stresses bubble up to the surface, in the process of being
released, they often take the form of random thoughts (there are a number of other ways these stresses can manifest, but this is most common).
So this wild mind is a good thing--it means you are letting go of a lot of stress in your nervous system. It's just that there is a lot more of it than you realize. If you have been traumatized in some way, there can be a tremendous amount
of it.
The key is to not create more of it (see below).
Without exception, whenever I encounter someone who says they've tried everything, and nothing works, there is one root cause that, once changed, causes everything to get better.
Let me explain.
When someone is traumatized, abused, wounded, etc., they begin to say to themselves, "The world is dangerous. I have to watch out for the dangers so as to try to avoid them." To watch out for all the things you are afraid of, worried
about, or otherwise want to avoid, you have to focus on them. When you focus on them, your brain takes that as an instruction to create more of them, or draw more of them into your life.
Your brain cannot tell, when you focus on something, that you don't want it. It cannot process "not." It takes whatever you focus on as a literal instruction to create it for you or draw it to you. And, if you add a lot of emotion, it sees
the instruction as being urgent.
The brain does this in many ways, some subtle, some not so subtle. But in one way or another, you create in your life whatever you focus on. When you focus on what you want to avoid or move away from, you get it.
When that happens, you say to yourself, "I must not have focused on avoiding these things hard enough or well enough," and you re-double your efforts--which just creates more of it, and the cycle continues.
This focusing on what you don't want happens outside your awareness, unconsciously. Rarely does someone realize what they're doing, how much they're doing it--or how destructive it is. The fact that it is unintentional, however, doesn't
matter. Your brain just continues to faithfully create whatever you focus on.
This pull to focus on what you don't want is fueled by the negative feelings of past traumas, which causes you to feel unsafe at a very deep level. The part of you that doesn't feel safe THINKS it must focus on danger in order to avoid it
and be safe, but this is not true. In fact, this very focusing on danger is what keeps you unsafe.
Fortunately, Holosync is very powerful in solving this problem. When you use Holosync, it calms that safety part of you. Another way I explain this is to say that, as you use Holosync, your threshold for what you can handle, and still feel
safe, goes up. As this threshold is raised, the desire to avoid danger (and therefore focus on it) diminishes.
This doesn't happen overnight, though, especially if there has been a lot of trauma. In some cases, the feeling of being unsafe, and therefore thinking that you have to avoid what you don't want, is so strong that it takes a considerable
length of time to calm that part of you that feels unsafe. For me, it took several years, because I did the same thing you are doing: I steadfastly focused on what I didn't want, thinking I had to in order to avoid it.
Your email is full of descriptions of what you don't want--a good indication that a lot, if not almost all, of your attention is focused on avoiding what you don't want. Holosync is ultimately stronger than your ability to resist, but by
resisting you do slow the process (and make yourself miserable in the meantime). This is the reason for the written support material, Mind Chatter, The Life Principles Integration Process online courses, our telephone support staff, and
our other ways of educating and supporting you as you use Holosync. I want you to understand how you have been unconsciously creating your experience of life, and how you can stop resisting and stop creating misery for yourself, and begin
to create the life you want.
It is very possible to go to therapy, and do every personal growth program in the universe, and--because you are so convinced, for safety reasons, that it is necessary--still focus intently on what you don't want. Personal growth programs
that really work, and all effective therapies, are really just ways to get you to focus on what you want instead of on what you are worried about, afraid of, or want to avoid. It's very possible to go through the motions of therapy or
while participating in a personal growth program--to do them very sincerely--but because the feeling of being unsafe is so strong, to continue to focus, all the while, on what you don't want.
Turning this around takes some effort, but it is possible. I did it, and you can, too (I also tried everything, and got nowhere, until I figured out WHY I was getting nowhere).
You have to begin to catch yourself thinking about what you don't want, and change your focus, immediately, to thoughts of what you do want. This means, of course, that you have to know what you want, which is a stumbling block for many
people. If you've spent your whole life focusing on avoiding danger and pain, the part of you that wants things is very likely out of practice. So, first, you need to get clear on what you do want--and make sure that what you want isn't
just what you don't want, painted over in positive language.
Then, whenever you notice yourself focusing on what you don't want (worrying, being afraid, thinking about negative consequences, making pictures in your head of what you want to avoid, etc.) immediately change to thoughts and internal
pictures of what you do want.
At first, you will stumble. You will realize, after the fact, that you've just spent a long time focusing on what you don't want, and realize that you didn't catch yourself. If you do catch yourself and successfully change your focus, you
may find yourself, ten seconds later, thinking about something negative. Your brain is used to running on automatic, and it will fight you, and try to continue to focus on the danger it thinks it needs to avoid.
It doesn't matter, however, that you will have trouble at first. Don't let the fact that there is a learning curve to this discourage you. You have to start somewhere. Make a commitment to yourself to change your focus to what you want as
soon as you notice you're thinking about what you're afraid of, and don't worry about the fact that you aren't very good at it at first. As you do this, you will gradually get better at it. Let it be okay that, at first, you won't do it
very well.
You will also find that it's very tiring to monitor yourself in this way, and you'll have times where you just want to say, "screw it." But keep going, and it will get easier. At a certain point, thinking about what you want will become
the predominant habit. Once that happens, you will begin to focus on what you want just as automatically as you now think about what you don't want.
As you do this, you will see big changes in your life, internally and externally. These positive changes will help reinforce the change and motivate you to continue. But be prepared that it won't happen overnight. You have a strong and
life-long habit of focusing on what you don't want, and that safety part still thinks it needs to do this to be safe--though it is mistaken. Unfortunately, focusing on what you don't want actually causes you to continue to feel unsafe, and
to continue to draw you into situations and to people that reinforce this feeling.
You might also consider creating a one minute movie or two in your head, about what you want and who you want to be, and watch this movie just before you fall asleep each night and just after you wake up, and a few other times during the
day.
Also, go get the book Psycho Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz, which is a classic on the subject of how to focus your mind on what you want. This book will give you some other very valuable information about the process of changing your focus.
I also strongly encourage you to enroll in my Life Principles Integration Process online course, in which we deal with this subject in great detail. You can read about the course and listen to a free preview lesson by
clicking here:
I understand the disappointment of trying one thing after another, with no discernable results. I've been there, believe me. The process of getting our hopes up and then being disappointed is, very often, worse than the original trauma, or
the lousy results we create in our life. Most people will do anything to avoid that disappointment, including staying miserable.
Unfortunately, things will get worse, no matter what other things you do, as long as you continue to focus on what you don't want.
It's not that you aren't good at manifesting results. The truth is, you're incredibly, amazingly good at creating whatever you focus on. It's that you're unintentionally and unconsciously focusing on the wrong things. You are focusing your
mind, like a laser beam, on what you don't want, and magnificently creating it. Instead, I want you to begin to consciously direct your focus to what you do want. When you do that, you will harness the same creative power, but this time
toward what you want.
You say that your mind won't let anything penetrate it, but that's not really true. Holosync penetrates your mind every time you use it, and will eventually raise your threshold and help you feel safe--even if you insist on focusing on
what you do not want. But the more the past trauma, the more you fight the process, and the longer it takes. It's not that nothing will penetrate your mind--your focus on what you don't want is penetrating just fine. But right now, you are
focusing so completely on what you do not want that there's no room left for focusing on what you do want.
I understand what you mean about wanting something that does something TO you, where you have "no choice " in it's effect on you. But really, what Holosync does is put you MORE at choice. You feel, right now, as if you are at the effect
end of the cause-and-effect spectrum, that you are at the effect of some cause you can't do anything about. You're just hoping Holosync will be a stronger cause that might override the other things you feel are controlling you.
But the real controller is that which you focus your mind on, and you CAN take change of that. The reason it looks as if you are at the effect of some outside cause is that the cause (how your mind is focused) is, right now, operating
outside your awareness. This makes it difficult to see that what happens is generated inside of you, and not from something outside.
You can do this. It isn't easy, and it takes some time for most people, but you can do it.
As you continue, let me know if I can help.
Be well.
Bill
Bill Harris, Director
PS: If this article was helpful to you, please forward Mind Chatter to a friend.
PPS: For more information about the online course and the FREE
preview lesson, and to actually listen to the preview lesson,
click here
11. Glowing Testimonials and Letters
Hello Bill:
Holey Moley!! Just finished listening to the Virtual Audio demo CD. It literally blew me away in the first THREE seconds!! It was nighttime, I was seated with my back to the outside door I thought was locked. It was so very realistic
that, with a blood -curdling scream, Iexploded out of my chair with such force my headphones flew off. I knocked over the tray with my cup ofsteaming lemon/ginger tea. Tripped over my dog and went head long intomy rickety bookshelves.
All of my books crashed to the floor & I made a mad scramble to safely put out my two beeswax candlesthat had fallen, stillburning.
This ALL transpired in less than 10 seconds. In split timing, I didn't know whether to keep screaming, laugh or cry. I sort of combined all three into a squeal-gulp-giggle. I picked up my traumatized dog, reassuring her that the world
as we knew it had not ended. I stepped back & replayed the whole thing and became engulfed in knee-slapping gales of laughter.
I put the headphones on again and this time, aware of the unbelievable, beyond reality, audio, made it through the entire CD. WOW! It gave me a new dimension of goose bumps. Especially when you whispered into my left ear. Even with
knowing all about the surprise technology, I still whipped my head to the left.
|
