I was in New York being filmed for a documentary this last week and was away from my email when I heard the news about Robin Williams’ suicide. An event like this really makes you think, doesn’t it? Robin Williams was one of those rare people who felt like family to almost everyone. He entertained us and made us

(This is part 3 of a 3 part series, so if you haven’t read or listened to parts 1 & 2, please do that before you read or listen to this one–unless you really don’t care whether any of this makes sense to you.)

When we left our story of chaos and reorganization a few days ago, I’d just revealed the exciting answer to this question:

Why, in a universe that is irrevocably falling apart, do some things (including you) become more complex, more ordered? How, in such a universe, could something as complex as life develop?

Then I told you all about dissipative structures–open systems that grow and evolve in response to their environement. This was so fascinating to everyone in the blogosphere that thousands of blogs instantly linked to this one. (And then I woke up.)

At any rate, let’s continue our story because I want to explain something closer to home: How all of this affects your life, at the most practical level.

Here, then, is the second Big Question: Why do we fight this process of chaos and reorganization (you do, you know)? Why is this fight unnecessary–and, does it really cause most of your suffering ? (Yes, it does.)

How do you reconcile the spiritual seeker’s yearning for “no self” with the equally sought-after desire for a psychologically healthy ego? Are these seeming opposites compatible? If so, how? Is one better than the other?

Since someone taking the second course of my Life Principles Integration Process online courses (which is about such spiritual matters) asked me…here’s my answer:

Bill:
Lesson 1 brought up for me 2 topics I’ve struggled with for awhile.  The first is how do you reconcile a spiritual “no self” with a “psychologically healthy “strong I.”  In other words if you truly see all as one, and practice no resistance (or as you call letting whatever happens be ok) how do you at the same time set boundaries and no longer allow “unhealthy people, things in your space” because by definition in doing that you are playing the duality game.

The 2nd is how do you reconcile – trying to control the game and therefore get the outcomes you want with the co-creative process with spirit.  Isn’t there a bigger picture or a higher self that might have a different agenda than what our ego thinks it wants at the moment?  So how do you play with the energies and when do you try for outcomes and when do you “let go and let god”.

Thanks,
Maureen

Maureen,

You’ve asked a key and fundamental question.

A few words about that elusive “oneness” so many people seek:

I’m often asked why we don’t feel the feeling of “oneness” with everything spoken about in certain religions. Why do we feel separate? Let’s take a look at this fascinating question.

Human beings are wired to navigate life by making distinctions. If you couldn’t make distinctions  you wouldn’t know what to eat. You wouldn’t know what’s good for you or what might harm you. You wouldn’t be able to recognize your friends. You wouldn’t know whether you were too hot or too cold. You wouldn’t be able to make choices, or learn from experience.

As I once heard Alan Watts say, to be a human being you need to be able to tell chalk from cheese.