ADDICTIVE INQUIRY:
Frankly, I am afraid to get off Holosync. I am afraid that once I stop listening that I will lack the ability to feel deeply into my soul as I have been lately. When speaking about the addiction potential, John Duprey stated: “Another of the extraordinary things about using brain entrainment technology with meditation, which I have found in myself and heard reported by others, is that even when not using the technology, the Holosync® practitioner is able to access deep meditative states”. I meditate with Holosync everyday for 45 minutes and continue sitting for the full hour and once a week do the full hour. (I find myself too stimulated when I do the whole thing, too emotional). Then at night I meditate for 30 to 45 minutes. I have no doubt that my meditation has deepened by the use of Holosync but my concern is, will it continue if I were to stop completely? What about when I cant afford to purchase anymore levels? Will I be doomed to samsara because of my lack of funding as a college student? It is like the saying that it is better not to start the spiritual path than to start it then stop. Is that even worse for Holosync? I am afraid to quit.

SPIRITUAL LIVING:
In the morning, I feel as if I am truly living in the mystery of the universe. Strangely though, I rarely ever feel the radiant Love of existence like I do on meditation retreats. I just experience the Suchness and the Mystery aspects of awakening. It is truly interesting and amazing and wonderful, though while on the peak of this delta wave change I never stop and analyze my experience to say ‘this is cool’, I just fully appreciate what is in front of me. Truly a shortcut, in my opinion, to awakening. Which is not good or bad necessarily, as the next section reveals. I am so wowed by the Mystery that I don’t even ‘know’ that I am in the Mystery.
Also, all of my, ‘filters of mind’ are seen through. So much so that I cannot even ’see’ the filters that are being seen through. That takes time. And as a ‘bonus’ my intuition increases by a ridiculous degree. It shocks me how I can just ‘know’ things sometimes with such little reason to.

SHADOW/SOUL WORK:
As I come down, in the evening, my soul begins to come back to the reality of a habituated ego, but with the trust and openness from experiencing the ‘high’ of Holosync. Every night is like a rebirth into ego. This is the time when I can become very emotional and expressive and my soul is let out, crying for the heaven it had but did not know it had. I do have emotional ‘leaks’ during the day, but they come and go so quickly that there is no time to digest them and explore their roots. For this, I have found that the Diamond Approach is a superior method of exploring the amazing relationship of Soul to Spirit. The soul is ‘prematurely’ let free from its cage of ego when on the high of Holosync, so our egoic position of a peak experience finds these things threatening, which is why I keep it at 45 minutes as the leaks become too much to handle. When in the safety of my own home, I can deeply, and I mean deeply, explore the beautiful inner terrain of my soul. This, I believe, is ABSOLUTELY essential for Holosync to have truly ‘expedient’ results as a spiritual tool. Otherwise you bump and bruise and learn blindly and eventually your soul catches on and relinquishes the illusion of ego. Is that really faster than just plain mindfulness or any other practice?

Also, I experience a significant degree of calm while I am ‘high’ from it (which, by the way, peaks for about 4 hours and slowly settles more and more throughout the day). I mean, sometimes I am suuuuuper calm.

So back to my original concern about its addictiveness. I can feel when Holosync starts to wear off later in the day, even during one hour days, and am back into a normally conditioned self. So my fear, once again, is that I’ll never be able to access the depths of my soul if I were to quite completely, as Holosync gives me the trust to access those depths. This may just be one big ‘bleh’ about my own spiritual path. Who knows, maybe all ‘teaching’ is just that and we all learn from one another’s stories.

INTENTION:
Why do we use Holosync? Is it the burning desire to know Truth? To know God? If, as spiritual teachers say, this very desire is the fire that burns away all of our illusory veils of ego, why do we need Holosync? I do not do it for the spiritual ‘high’, because honestly, its not intrinsicly desirable or pleasureable. Its up and down just like life is, its just more dynamic while being able to retain a sense of calm. What is more desirable for me is to burn away all of our resistances to the simple Truth of what is right now, which occurs in the night when it starts wearing off. This is for the soul work in other words. Its silly to want the state of Holosync because there is no glory in it, no sweetness. Its just raw experience, a ‘premature’ awakening. How is that desirable to a soul that is believing the lie of ego? It is the work itself that we desire. The slow freeing of our souls conviction that there is something better somewhere else, something more satisfying. It is a catch-22. A paradox. A loop with no exit. We cannot want the experience of Holosync and want the Truth at the same time. The Truth is not found in any experience, no matter how raw it is, no matter how many filters of the mind are suspended. So, I guess my intention of using Holosync is for soul work, not ’spiritual development’. It is best for what is called in the Integral movement the Shadow.

THE CONTRAST:
Now this is a weird thing to talk about but truthful nonetheless. So I am experiencing someone during the day while I am still ‘high’ and am calm and authentic throughout our interaction. Then I see them in the night and I am a rip roaring talkative crazy guy that wants to get everyone excited and moving. (Ennea-type 7, by the way). So dynamic. Strangely though, I don’d mind it too much. Others though, can seem to get dissapointed when they see me so ‘real’ during the day and speedy and avoiding at night. So dynamic.

THE BIG QUESTION:
Is it really worth it? I would have to say yes. In spite of my fears of addiction and the other confusing and difficult aspects of dynamics I would have to say that, yes, it is worth it. My soul screams yes, breathing the fresh air of beauty that surrounds her.

FROM BILL: Whatever changes Holosync creates are permanent. And, believe me, there is a lot more to come. You are going through a phase where the applecart has been upset, but it will stabilize (and then be upset again, and then stabilize again, and…). Talk to someone from support.

But I found that part very interesting because I always had a problem with the notion that we are split into separate parts. The first time I had this problem was trying to figure out what was the mind vs the body vs the spirit; and who was in charge of me.

FROM BILL: An organism’s mind creates ideas. One of those ideas is the idea of “me.” That idea of me, however, is NOT the doer, nor is it the organism, anymore than the organisms idea of reality is reality, or it’s idea of any particular thing IS that thing. Ideas represent reality, but they aren’t the thing they represent. All I’m saying is that what you think of as me is an idea, and it isn’t YOU–yet you (and almost all people) confuse the idea for the reality. As the great Alfred Korzibski said, “The map is not the territory.”

FROM BILL: Read my other posts on this blog. I’ve explained it in detail in other places. What you think of as “you” is your idea of you. Ideas can’t do anything. An organism with a nervous system can do something, but the ideas that nervous system has are not doing anything. This is the mass delusion of humanity.

Read the many other posts I’ve done about this.

“What hopefully happens in meditation is the realization that while feelings happen, there is no feeler–no separate “you” who then feels something. Feelings happen, but a separate feeler is not necessary and does not exist (contrary to what nearly everyone takes to be common sense).” But who is doing the realization? And who wrote this comment? No one? Furthermore are we going to end all system of justice as well, after all, if there is no self to punish and the crimes just exist in thin air what point is there to punish anyone?

Another absurdity is also obvious in the analogy with flashes “but no need for a flasher, a separate something that does the flashing.” This seems to deny the distinction between cause and effect, which in turn denies the second noble truth of buddhism, that dukkha is cause by desire. Thus, the version of buddhism Bill seems to be advancing seems to be incoherent.

FROM BILL: You have missed the point. There is an organism that, in response to its environment, acts (the environment and the organism are really one thing, however–the distinction between the two is mental). What people think of as the self, however, is not the actor. The self is a collection of ideas with no more substance that your IDEA of happiness or blueberries or hot sex.

So when I say that acting happens without the need for an actor, I am saying that when acting happens there is no need for a supposed separate self. I didn’t say that there’s nothing there that feels something–I said that there is no separate self that feels something. The organism responds to what is going on around it, but the “self” doesn’t respond (it’s just an idea).

You’re right that there’s no one who realizes anything, though. I’m saying that there is no SELF that realizes anything. The organism’s nervous system creates ideas. The idea of “I” is, however, just another one of the ideas. It is NOT the actor or the decider.

Not long after I wrote that comment I had a big AHA! moment. I thought there was no way I could be displaying some of those qualities that I absolutely hated. I realised that I had disowned those qualities because a long time ago I had displayed those things fully in my life and people didnt like me so I changed myself and hid them away but I realise that you are right I just wanted to tell you that, and I will try speaking from those perspectives. Thanks Bill

FROM BILL: Great insight. Good for you.

Meditation has helped me to be aware. Thank you for the work you do and the services you provide.

I have been doing holosync for a while now currently doing awakening level 2. I have been trying to get my head around the shadow and trying to work out what my shadows are. I can tell you what annoys me people who smother me, are controlling, selfish, and who lie and are insincere. I dont think I am like any of those things if anything I am the opposite but from what you have said thats what I am expressing. why am I attracting people like this there are so many people who in my life are like this, I must tell you to that I am not a very assertive person I run away from everything instead of dealing with them and confronting people I would like to have more guts. what do you think?
I have to tell you holosync has helped me incredibly so thankyou for that, I hope you come to australia someday I would love to come to one of your workshops

FROM BILL: I think those things that bother you are your shadows. Everyone but you can see it, because you have disowned these parts of yourself. You need to speak from “the one who smothers”, “the controller”, “the liar”, “insincerety” and “selfishness”. You have disowned these normal human aspects of yourself, so they are being expressed in a dysfunctional ways in you, and you are attracting others who also express these qualities. Let them out of the basement and they will mature. Let them speak.